Qualifying women dating
The amazing thing is that people are more likely to give a candid answer to a casual acquaintance than to someone they're starting to date.
You just have to ask while you're still a casual acquaintance. You run into Studly Tom or Sexy Suzanne at the coffee machine and say, "Oh, hi. Did you get around that jam-up on the Lakeside Interchange?
It's all too easy to fall for a cute face or a sexy body and wind up with a time-waster, or in crazy love, or even in a bad marriage.
And if "The Pitfalls of Cyberlove" have clouded your judgement before you even meet the other person, you're in even more danger.
Ask him/her to feed your goldfish or water your plants while you're away and see if everything's alive or dead when you get home.
Make dates far into the future and don't call to remind him or her when the time comes. Call on them if you need help with something, and see if they volunteer to help or tell you they're busy or it's your problem.
You can quickly find whether you can depend on them or not.
If their immediately-prior ex lives in the same city or area, you may get a chance to meet the person at a social or community event. Introduce yourself and say something like, "Hi, I'm Norm New Guy (or Norma Next), and I know you were together with Perfect Patty (or Tom Terrific) for quite a while.
Some people go around with a bumper sticker saying, "Happiness Is Being Single" -- and they really mean it." Then sip your coffee, smile, and say "You should see how all the girls/(guys) look at you.I bet you're really enjoying the single life..." Their immediate response will be telling. Someone who'd like to be through with playing, on the other hand, may be flattered but will also look vaguely uncomfortable, as if the shoe doesn't quite fit, and may even tell you, "Actually, it gets a little old." Either way, you've got your answer.Let's be clear about something that should be common sense. If you're in such a situation (and I've had many clients who were), you are not helpless. Instead, plan a party to which you will each invite some of your oldest and closest friends.Unless you're making a fool of yourself chasing someone who doesn't care about you, the feelings in your deepening relationship should be mutual. If he or she refuses to cooperate or claims he or she has no friends to invite, see "Your Last Recourse" below. Make sure the party's large enough so that it's sure to break up into several conversation groups.